As a kid, I had big dreams for my life.
I wanted to be published.
And be a female Indiana Jones.
And live in a house with pillars, window seats and have a room with a turret where I would write and write all day long.
I’d shop in amazing bookstores, travel the globe, dress rather bohemian and…most importantly, I would have clear skin.
Until recently, none of those had happened. Sometimes dreams change. I’m not rich and not sure I want to be. I don’t like getting dirty so the Indiana Jones dream didn’t last long. Some dreams may not happen. I still want my dream house…and clear skin. Some dreams change. I exchanged amazing bookstores for Amazon because I lack patience to browse. I’ve done a bit of traveling. Some dreams that I never allowed myself to consider came true; my husband and kids.
And some dreams just refuse to die no matter how hard you try to kill them. I tried killing the writing dream. (too old, not realistic, lacking education, etc.) But then…The Blank Journal (hosted by a fantastic writing instructor, Christin Taylor) published an essay of mine earlier this month.
I’m very grateful to Christin and her team for the opportunity. I know everyone else who has a piece published with Christin this month feels the same way. There’s something very satisfying, exciting, and scary about having other people read something that you’ve poured a lot of work (and tears) into.
So…at the age of 38, one of my goals from childhood has been accomplished.
I guess I have to try to do it again.
But I don’t know how. Or if I can.
It’s been easy to hide behind work and my family. I don’t have time. My husband’s in school. Only one person can chase their dreams at one time. But the reality is, I’m so bitterly unhappy when I’m not writing. I feel empty inside when I go a day without putting pen to paper or fingers to keyboard. Without the written word, I feel lost.
It’s tough to admit that I’m not happy. I’m not content. Something has to change.
So here it goes…I’m a writer. And I need a plan…a life plan.
I’ve been sitting on Michael Hyatt’s “Creating Your Personal Life Plan” e-book for a few weeks now. I hesitated to use it. Mr. Hyatt is a leader; chairman of the board at Thomas Nelson Publishing. I’m a church secretary, closing in on 40 and sport 2 year degree from a community college. We’re not exactly cut from the same cloth. But tomorrow, I’m running away from home for a day to seriously read through Mr. Hyatt’s e-book and starting planning the next stage of my life.