Do As I Say, Not As I Do

This kid and I have a lot in common.

Maybe too much.

I frequently lament to my husband that this kid got all of his great qualities and all of my negative ones.

Meathead (affectionately called. He’s wicked smart) gets sick about once every two years but when it happens, it takes an awful lot of work to convince him that he’s actually ill.

Today he stood in front of me pale, swaying, clutching his head, sweating and ARGUING with me that he could not miss marching band camp. We stood toe-to-toe in the hallway debating on whether or not he was fit to go.

He wasn’t.

I won.

Or did I?

I initially congratulated myself on having a son with a great work ethic but I don’t think that’s entirely accurate. I think Meathead held a mirror up to me today and forced me to face that I believe about myself. A lie that he’s starting to believe as well.

The verbage varies depending on the situation, but the lie usually sounds something like:

I can’t miss this.

I’ll be in trouble.

They need me.

If I screw this up, I’ll never get another chance.

I’m raising a people pleaser.

Lord help me, my son was willing to jeopardize his health today for marching band.

Marching band.

What kind of choices is he going to make when he has a job, a family and a mortgage?

There’s no denying it. He got this from me. I’ve been known to take more than the recommended dose of cold medicine or migraine medication so I wouldn’t miss work. I’ve chugged more coffee than I should have when I didn’t get enough sleep. I’ve skipped the gym when it inconvenienced others.

All in the name of people pleasing.

Meathead is closing in on turning 15 so all the lecturing in the world isn’t going to have an affect.

I think I’m going to have to change.

And hope he’s paying attention.

Have your kids actions reminded you of your own?

Did it force you to change?

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One thought on “Do As I Say, Not As I Do

  1. He wants to learn and participate and make a difference and nothing is going to stop him…the world needs more kids like that, I think. He got the best part of you, Vikki…you should be proud!

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